funniest akpors jokes

An angry wife (Ekaitte) 2
her
husband
(Akpors) on phone.
Ekaitte: Where the hell are
you? ...
... Akpors: Honey, u
remember
dat gold shop
where u saw the
diamond
necklace & totally
fell in luv wit it?
Ekaitte (relaxed): Yes, my
king
Akpors: Remember I had
no
cash 2 buy it 4 u
dat day & I said I will buy
it 4 u
one day?
Ekaitte (totally relaxed
with a
smile & a blush):
Yes I remember my love!
Akpors: Good, I am in a
beer
palour next to
that shop!
More to come...
A Community pastor
was getting
tired of
hearing his congregation
confess of adultery
every time.
So, he told the
community to
adopt saying
they have "fallen" & not
go into
details.
(As he would
understand)
The old Pastor died &
Pastor
Akpors - a new
pastor from outside the
town
was sworn in.
Everyday people go to
him & say
they have
fallen.
Pastor Akpors being
concerned &
not
knowing what's going on
called
the village
chief & said to him,
"I think u should get the
pavements fixed,
people tell me that they
have
fallen everyday."
The Chief laughed
hysterically
knowing exactly
what it means.
"Don't laugh" says Pastor
Akpors.
"Your wife fell 7 times
this week"
The chief fainted
1)Akpos goes to a store
for
groceries. He finds cat
food at a
very special low price. He
buys
a dozen cans of cat food.
The
manager sees this and
thinks
that Akpos probably
doesn't
own a cat and he might
give
the cat food to his
children. He
goes to Akpos and ask
him to
bring the cat as proof for
him
to buy the cat food.
Akpos goes
and bring his cat and the
manager lets him buy the
dozen cans.
A few days later Akpos
finds
dog food at a low lower
price.
He buys a dozen cans of
dog
food. Again the manager
wants
proof that he owns the
dog.
Akpos goes to get his
dog and
the manager lets him
buy.
A few days later Akpos
goes to
the store carrying a bag.
He ask
the manager to put his
hand in
the bag and feel what is
inside.
After feeling what's in the
bag
the manager says, "What
the
f**k? What is this? Is this
poo?"
Akpos nodded and
replied, "Yes
I wanted to buy toilet
paper
and I don't want you to
send
me back for proof again."
2)akpos a bus driver was
arguing with his coductor
on who was more
brilliant.
DRIVER: U nor go school.
CONDUCTOR: Haba! I go
school
pass u.
DRIVER: Oya, wetin b 2
times 2?
CONDUCTOR: Ahan! Very
easy!
Dat one na 22 now.
DRIVER: Fool! Person tell
u d
answer for back abi.